Waistband Size For Your Haus

Low impact living sounds like a passive aggressive ideal or just being apathetic at best. In reality, there is a website called Low Impact Living that allows you to see what kind of carbon footprint you and your haushold are leaving.

Our LILI is 58, what’s yours?

When I look at our stats, it makes me want to do more, so that we leave less.

The next two things I would like to implement/ purchase are a composter & a rain barrel. Funny that in order to reduce, I have to buy.

The Total Peanut Butter Sandwich Makeover

“I don’t want to walk across hot coals because it is fun, but if I can be shown how a short, painful walk will do away with the lifetime of worry, frustration, stress, and fear that being constantly broke brings me, then bring on the hot coals.” — Dave Ramsey, Total Money Makeover

“If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.” -Bill Watterson

“To think that the handling of your personal finances is merely a matter of math control is naive. You must get better control of all aspects of your life. Until you do, [even the best advice] will have little effect but will instead be neutralized by the other habits in your life.” — Dave Ramsey, Financial […]

We are winning the debt race. Dave and I will be debt free between July & August of this year. This has been an uphill struggle, but we have learned much in this time. We recently tallied how many peanut butter sandwiches we have eaten for lunch. Does anyone want to take any guesses? 25? 100? 500? 1000? If you guessed 500, you are WRONG, haha! Yes, that’s right, we have collectively eaten over 1000 peanut butter sandwiches.

Perseverance, goal setting, discipline, and much grace was required (and a friend who made homemade preserves was a lifesaver). People’s comments of, “I could never do that!” would almost fuel our drive to keep eating pb&J because we knew it was a matter of choice in the end.

We calculated that we could have 3 peanut butter sandwiches (2 were Daves), chips, an apple, and an occasional soda (always purchasing the 12 packs for less than $2.75) for less than $1 each/ day. Just by not going out to eat, we saved approximately $3500 a year.

For those who are wondering, we did not gain weight- if you consider the fat grams in a combo meal or pizza to a pb&j sandwich, it is a no-brainer. We take the stairs and walk whenever possible. The little steps are what add up quickly.

We are indeed on our way. Although I am switching over to ramen. We’ll see how long I last, I may be returning to peanut butter.

Awkward Goodbyes, Even More Awkward Hellos

Tomorrow is my last day at A to Z. This is the company that my brother started, carried, and left. He brought much vision to the company. Even today, one of our state directors was commenting on how he still uses some of the writing material that he created. “He is a word smith,” was his comment. I concur. He is crazy gifted in so many areas of life: fatherhood, business, vision, relationships, organization…

This is the company that I have been with for four plus years. This is the company I used to give 70-80 hours a week of my life in the beginning. This is the company to whom I attribute the grey hairs now residing on my head (besides the fact that I’m getting older).

This is the company that I have grown with. I have learned about leadership, management, values, organization, and follow through.

This is the company that I carry both fond and difficult memories with. This is the company that I have grown to love many people. This is the company that I am saying good bye to. It is a bittersweet stage in our life, sad to leave, excited about opportunities around the corner.

Customer Service, part Rambo (w/o the violence, haphazardness, and swearing)

“It is more blessed to give than to receive, but there is more grace in receiving than giving. When you receive, whom do you love and praise The giver. When you give, the same holds true.” -Jessamyn West, The Woman Said Yes (1976)

It is not natural or human, for one to think of serving another. In a world of apathy and self preservation, one has to be strategic and intentional about looking beyond one self.

Here are some of the things I have practiced:

• While at a restaurant or store, asking for the manager when an employee has done a great job
• Filling out a comment card for an employee, being specific on how they were helpful
• Telling the employee directly how much & why I appreciate them
• Asking my director of operations in my company if we could buy $5 starbucks gift cards for the employees who work with us out of state, and for anyone within the corporation who has gone above and beyond the call of duty to help us out (Everyone responded immediately with emails, voicemails and cards filled with gratefulness. We even had one lady from corporate cry b/c of the kind words given.–Yes that’s right folks, I make grown women cry.)
• Making eye contact, recognizing the employee as a person, and smiling
• Asking how I can pray for that person (if appropriate & available, praying with the person)

Things I have not done, but plan on doing:

• Buying $5-$10 gift cards to the mail person, Fed Ex, UPS folk who serve the company we work at on a regular basis– to thank them for their consistent help (who thinks to thank them, let alone interact with them (dave does a good job w/that, I am grateful and proud))
• Buying gift cards for servers/ employees who have done a great job, in addition to a good tip
• Buying coffee gift cards to those who are in the military, to thank them for their service and commitement
• Making a dessert for my local bank tellers (love them) and or local coffee haus family
• Making cookies for the local fire/ police department

So far, most of what I have thought of is connected to gift cards or food. Does anyone have any other ideas???

I am continually amazed and humbled by how a kind word or generous spirit can move people. These words and actions are not taken lightly or forgotten easily. People are generally on the defensive side when working with others, because the norm is selfishness, laziness, intolerance, and greed.

When one is in a position of service, that person has the ability to withhold grace. When one is in the place to receive, grace and generosity can flourish.

Customer Service, part uno

“They never raised a statue to a critic.” -Martha Graham, in Agnes de Mille, Dance to the Piper (1952)

” ‘Can I help you?’ she enquired, in a manner that said she hoped she wouldn’t have to.” -Liza Cody, Dupe (1981)

Having experience in retail, food service, and business, I carry high standards for customer service. I also try to be gracious, friendly, and generous with those I interact with in these fields, knowing that it is not easy to deal and or work with the public. My continued frustration and rant is the crummy attitudes and lack of helpfulness that most employees I encounter freely pass out.

Today, this occurred twice, in two different settings. My normal response is the following:

• to create a criticism/ complaint to the management and or company at large
• to create a conversation to the employee about why this person is a crum-bum (notice the “to” the employee, not “with”)

As I was developing one of these criticisms in the car, I was reminded of the following:

• even when I am “nice”, it does not really move people forward and or guarantee a pleasant response back
• my criticisms of others does not move me forward
• I am not seeing these people as broken and hurting, or image bearers of God
• prayer is the one thing I can truly combat crapulence of self and others

My thoughts and prayers are directed to the following:

• Lord, have mercy on me a sinner
• Lord, have mercy on said employee ____________ (I generally note the name, especially when I am preparing my complaint)
• strengthen my heart and increase my compassion for those around me
• open my heart to their needs, not mine
• soften their hearts to You, Lord- may they see Your truth, grace, and abundance

I am not here to be served, but rather to serve those who are before me.

Maybe it’s time we start coming with an attitude to serve those who are in service roles.

Mentoring Resource

Yesterday, Dave directed me to Matt Keller’s blog from Next Level Church. He is a man of vision and strategery. He talks about different forms of mentoring. It is good stuph-check check, check it out. Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

Mentoring can be formal or informal. These are some benefits I have experienced with setting up a formal relationship: By settng up a formal mentoring relationship, the mentor has been more proactive in meeting on a regular basis. That person makes the extra effort and time available for me. By not formalizing that relationship, the tendency is to let time slip by and the next time you meet is a year later. If you are wanting to be intentional, how much growth really occurs once a year?

What Matt discusses, is spot on as well. Finding and listening to the voices that have a postive influence in your life can be found through people, books, messages, podcasts, blogs, etc.

They Must Be Good Friends

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” -Anais Nin (1937), The Diary of Anais Nin, vol. 2 (1967)

“The test of being a good host is how well the departing guest likes himself.” -Marcelene Cox, in Ladies’ Home Journal (1954)

“Whether you live in a basement with the income of a ten-year-old girl or on a saffron farm in the south of Spain, the spirit of hospitality is the same. It’s the giving of yourself, a present of you to them from me for us.

‘Hello, and I like you.’ This is what you’re saying when you invite somebody into your home, without having to hear yourself say it out loud.” -Amy Sedaris, introduction to I Like You, Hospitality Under the Influence 2006

Our friends, Daniel, Cara, & Malcom Skiver were visiting from MI. Cara mentioned that she was teaching him sign language. I flashed the sign for poo, and Malcom, the brainiac, absorbed the sign instantly. It was amazing how quick a one year old can learn something. He was even articulating his thumb and fingers. The Skivers took the new sign in stride. I thank them for their humour & graciousness with their quirky friend.

On our recent visit to Fort Myers, FL, the one thing that stood out, was everyone’s hospitality. It was not about creating a massive spread, or providing something gourmetish. It was about enjoying each other’s time together. No fuss was made outside of the normal.

In thoughts of hospitality, I tend to have ideas of glory and grandeur. It was both refreshing and a relief to see this side of hospitality being lived out through our friends. And as travellers, by eating a home cooked meal, it allowed for our pocket books to not be stretched disproportionately.

With this new lesson learned, we provided grilled dogs, microwaved quesadillas, and ice cream sandwiches. It was nice to not be harried before our guests arrived tonight. Fancy- nay, delicious- yes. A good time was enjoyed by all.

Mentoring Schmentoring

“Making mental connections is our most crucial learning tool, the essence of human intelligence: to forge links; to go beyond the given; to see patterns, relationship, context.” -Marilyn Ferguson, The Aquarian Conspiracy (1980)

“We can only love a person who eats what we eat.” -Rigoberta Menchu, in Elisabeth Burgos-Debray, ed. I Rigoberta Menchu (1983)

It is the people who are willing to invite me into their lives that have had the most profound impact on me. These are the ones who go out to coffee, who open up and share stories, who laugh at my antics, who read books with me, who make me chicken noodle soup when I’m sick, who pray with and for me, who openly and freely encourage me without provocation, who celebrates the big and small victories, and ask the agonizingly painful questions. thank you

If you are not mentoring, if you do not have a mentor, slap yourself in the head. Now do it again! Keep doing it, until you are moving forward and making a difference. It is worth every moment together.

Generosity begets Freedom

the more i move towards generosity, the freer i am with myself, with my belongings, with my time

when i am stingy, i withold: a part of me, love, God’s provision

when selfishness takes residence in my heart, i am more apt to become bitter, resentful, and downright hateful

my mindset moves to: i rightfully deserved / earned this, & i take credit for what’s not mine

i take away God’s provision and faithfulness

if i give when it hurts, it allows me to share in that struggle with others

Welcome Sage!

“Though it is fairly easy to describe what constitutes a bad home, there is no simple definition of a good one. Conformity with the traditional pattern certainly is no guarantee of the happiest results.” -Alva Myrdal and Viola Klein, Women’s Two Roles (1956)

“Every family is a “normal” family–no matter whether it has one parent, two or no children at all. A family can be made up of any combination of people, heterosexual or homosexual, who share their lives in an intimate (not necessarily sexual) way…Wherever there is lasting love, there is a family.” -Shere Hite, The Hite Report on the Family (1994)

Sage is officially part of our family now, even though she has been a part of our hearts for 19 months. One may dispute the constitution of what is proper or moral, but one cannot dispute the love and adoration that Scott & Jon have for their dear little Sage.

Welcome, welcome, welcome! We pray many blessings to pour forth into your life, Sage. We pray for wisdom & discernment, for healing from past & future hurts, for joy everlasting, for a heart that stretches beyond the horizon, and for unity, compassion, and love within our family. We love you so very much!